Thanks to Dutch priest, social critic, and mansplainer Erasmus, women have been referred to as The Fair Sex for over 500 years. While the words themselves conjure images of softness, kindness, thoughtfulness, and gentility, it is meant to have a slightly demeaning undertone. It is intended to suggest that women are less than, that they require assistance to survive the wildly entangled jungle that is life. Women, being such delicate flowers, are supposed to think being referred to as The Fair Sex is a compliment.
Aside from the fact that this term was coined by a priest (who presumably never knew a woman), what bothers me is that there is no male counterpart to this misogynistic moniker. Men are just men. Dudes, bros, gents, guys. There is no polite yet subtly derogatory term for them. Oh sure, one can think of any host of blue names for the males of the species, but a term for use in polite society? No, this we are lacking.
To this end, I would like to propose the term The Primitive Sex. Obviously, The Rough Sex is too misleading a label. The Smelly Sex, aside from possessing some rather off-putting imagery, is too limited. The Emotionally Inept Sex is too long, The Clueless Sex is too vague. The Ignorant Sex too harsh, The Lecherous Sex too impolite. No, I think The Primitive Sex sums it up nicely. After all, many men like being thought of as primitive. Remember that whole Fire in the Belly movement? The one with men in loincloths carrying fire on a stick and practicing Primal Scream therapy in the forest? So very manly. So very primitive.
Men love to satisfy their untamed urges by hunting things, whether they be actual animals or just channels on TV. The cooking of meat over a fire is enough to raise their testosterone to near Tarzan levels. They revel in displaying their unruly body hair. It is socially acceptable for them to be sweaty, dirty, stinky, and sweary. They are a primordial lot, indeed.
At the same time, the title The Primitive Sex implies that men are somehow incomplete; that they are coarse, uncivilized, possess below average emotional intelligence, and are oblivious to most of the subtleties of life. This seems a reasonable trade for insinuating that women are weak, incapable, require protection, and should be demure.
Please don’t think me a misandrist. I am, in fact, a misanthrope through and through. I am merely making an argument for gender equality in “the parlance of our times”. After all, what’s fair is fair, right?